Friday, December 14, 2012

Multiple choice Tess(t)

 In the spirit of my final today, I present a multiple choice Tess(t)!

From the images above, please choose the correct answer from below.  However, you may have misread this question and the object may to be to chose the INcorrect answer.  It's unclear. 

Tess in the above images is saying:

a. Put a bow on the puppy before giving it to the kids for Xmas

b. Brittany's don't wear clothes OR bows

c. There better be treats in this for me

d. Don't fool yourself.  I'm not smiling.  It's an involuntary zygomaticus m. reaction to my stress panting.

e. Don't think you can make up for ignoring me this week in favor of Connor by putting a bow on me to feel special

f. Just because it took me 4 days to realize there was a bird in the house doesn't make me any less of a bird dog.

g.  At least I'm not wearing the sleigh bells today.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Tess talks and a trick show off


Tess here.
It's time for the rest of the story.

Apparently Mel has been telling you all sorts of "truths" about functional clothing for doggies, and from the latest pictures she has posted, you might be led to believe that my life is filled with outdoor activities, dog beds, and a reasonable owner. I'm here to tell you that is not the case.

Did she tell you that she spray painted me green?

I thought not.

And then put a bunch of "accessories" on?

This is my unhappy face

And then there was last Friday

The vet school had a holiday party and I knew I was in trouble when she tried this on me:

Really?? Do you see the dog on the tag?! Pug!!! Not Brittany! Brittany's don't need hats.

So we settled on another theme - bells on my toes.

And my neck apparently, but no one has shown my Christmas song where THAT came out of

This is my "There better be a treat in this" face.

Btw - what does this say? Should I be worried? I've been rather naughty but shhhhhhhhh....she doesn't know yet. Unless this is one of those stupid signs that lists my crimes. Then I know I should take up another hobby besides digging out gophers in the front lawn.

Now, did I get treats from enduring this ridiculousness? Of course not! I had to prove I was a good dog by showing off a trick.

Well...a partial trick, apparently this is turning into a full handstand some day but Mel says she wants to make sure I have the right back and shoulder muscle and didn't want to push to hard because up until a couple of months ago she said I was still a puppy. But then I started disciplining puppies, which she says makes me not a puppy anymore (apparently I do a good job with the puppies and do it just right, Mel and everyone says so!)

One more thing - Mel is going to talk about how she thinks I'm unilaterally deaf in a future post and I'm neither confirming nor denying the allegations until I know which will get more more treats and freedom.