Just because you appear to have opposable thumbs does not mean you get to use them to gain you life rewards. Just because you CAN doesn't make it acceptable, even if you think the benefit risk ratio is stacked in your favor.
Sincerely, Mel
PS
I've been pretending not to notice your predilection to for sleeping next to OTHER people's feet, even with your lousy excuse of being able to better
PPS
Matt agrees that it's scary creepy how you stare at me from across the room. Just come sleep at my feet and under my desk please.